“God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the power to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference”.

I have always thought of God as a metaphor. It helps humanity to imagine an objective perspective on their own lives that is all-knowing and benevolent. Everyone’s spirituality is unique and personal and everyone has their own god that lives within them. In this way, God is both male and female, black and white, and versed in every language. The power and serenity that you desire can only come from within, and only if you follow the path of the one true god, your own. I don’t believe that there is any wrong religion. Some may say that we only pray when things are going wrong. Prayer. Each day I take time to reflect on the thing which are happening in my life, whether good or bad. I acknowledge that I am grateful for some things and I acknowledge that bad things happen for a reason and I pray that I will find the strength within myself to deal with them. My grandma told me yesterday that Papa has a tumor and said to me, “Amber, I know that you’re agnostic but could you please pray for Papa?” Just because I’m agnostic doesn’t mean that I don’t pray. I may not pray like you do but I still do. It’s the idea of asking for help aloud that makes you more aware of what you want and in turn makes it more attainable. It’s like when you receive positive reinforcements or motivation, it makes you believe that you can complete the task at hand and if you believe you will succeed. Its psychology and energy. The whole world is made up of energy and I think that if so many people “pray” for the same thing then all that concentrated energy does something. It’s mindpower and good faith.
I was telling Jesse about Papa and made the comment that I had been worrying about it so I prayed about it and got this big long lecture about how god doesn’t exist and this that and the other. It enrages me so much that this person was so close to me for so long and knows absolutely nothing about me and my beliefs. And then on top of that chooses to chastise me for saying that I pray. Praying makes me feel better, even though I am unaware if they are actually being heard or not. I always try to do good things for people in need without asking for reimbursement. I’m a strong believer in fate, karma and destiny. I believe that I am part of something bigger. I believe that everything happens for a reason and I believe that if you seek an answer you will find it within yourself if you are patient. I don’t expect some deity to speak words of wisdom to me when I pray or present me with an answer to my problems, so just shut up and leave me alone. It’s bad that I’m talking to a guy who is hard core atheist and he has never said one harsh word to me about my spirituality or my beliefs on god or what god might be and here you are, being in my life for four years and want to rip me a new one for saying I prayed for the strength to deal with this situation and to be hopeful of a good outcome. Go fuck yourself. Why do I continue talking to you?